Up in the morning before the break of day...

I woke this morning to one of the headaches I described yesterday. Annoying and centered right at the back of the head just below the crown. Not throbbing but certainly enough to let you know it is there.

I read that some of these headaches can be helped by a mix of NSAID's and muscle relaxers so I took my Mobic, which is a Cox-2 inhibitor and the max dose of Flexeril as well as the Darvocet and it seems to be providing some relief. Of course with all those meds I am barley able to keep my head up right now. Maybe it is time to go watch MSNBC and see what is going on.

CHRONIC HEADACHES IN ARACHNOIDITIS

CHRONIC HEADACHES IN ARACHNOIDITIS

I have been wondering for some time now about the headaches that I have been getting. They are not at all like a migraine or a cluster from what I have read. Sometimes I am fine for weeks at a time and then out of the blue I will wake with a headache that will last for days and sometimes a week. Narcotics offer little relief if any from them and when they do it is more in the form that I am able to get some sleep. While looking around I found this site and right off the top (#1) it describes what I experience. They are never so bad that I am unable to function rather they are in the "background" and annoying.

I did indeed have a myleogram as well as the ESI's and I am waiting for the hospital to get me a copy of the records from those. I am interested in seeing as well as verifying what they gave me during those procedures. I do not recall at anytime during them anyone mentioning this as a possible side effect long term. In fact I clearly recall the doctor telling me that I might have a headache in an hour or so after the procedures but it would subside. The cause of the headache being the introduction of fluid into the spinal column.

The only way I can explain it that might make sense is imagine a balloon filled with water and tied off. There is nowhere for the water to go as it is totally enclosed. Know, without bursting the balloon add more liquid to it. When you do this it will not only increase the volume of water it will increase the pressure that the balloon is exerting. Know imagine that balloon is the membrane that surrounds your spinal column and brain. When you add the fluid and it expands it has no where to go and it will exert its pressure on the brain. I know this may be an oversimplification of what happens after an ESI but I think it gets the picture across.

My beef with all of this is that I was not informed of the long term effects of the ESI and Myleogram by anyone during the process. The bitch of that is that none of the ESI's provided me with the relief they had hoped for and the myleogram did not show them the nerves that were being pinched. Of course we did not know any of this before the procedures so it really does not matter, it is just one of those things. Kind of like being kicked after you have gone to the mat.

I probably would have still gone through all the procedures had I known the long term effects but I would have at least been able to do more research on them before deciding. I fell into the typical doctor/patient trap of "he/she is the doc and the professional ,so I will just do it." This has certainly taught me that if it something pertaining to my body I want more then that as an excuse to have a procedure and I certainly want to know about all possible side effects. I think the docs appreciate this approach now as well. I have found that when I approach them about an issue and I also express what I have learned about it they are more apt to let me have a say in how we will proceed.

Damnit

Well I guess it has been a non-eventful day. We went over to Home Depot to see about getting the deck sliding glass doors replaced with steel French doors with the double pained windows and the vertical blinds between the windows. We have had this house for 3 years and have hated the deck doors from day one. We also looked at some privacy fence for the south side of the backyard. Finally block out the blight of a yard next door. How could someone let their house become that funky and dilapidated?

Found some cool stuff as well as all the summer stuff that is on sale now like the lawnmower we have looked at like 100 times. It was almost half off and is now just $499. It is one of those beasts that cuts, mulches and vacuums. Since we have a ton of trees we spend a lot of time in the fall raking and bagging. It would be nice to have the mower do it all for you. They also had some grills on sale. Our's is on it's last leg and should be put out to pasture.

I also stopped by the pharmacy to pick up my refill of meds. They kill me with the way they do business. It is the same prescription I have had before only this time the doc wrote it for double the amount. It still only cost the $5 co-pay. There are some meds that are cheaper for me to buy without the co-pay. I have a 3 tier plan that is divided into Generic/Preferred/Non-Preferred. The last one is the one that kills me. It is basically for drugs that have no generic equals like Flexiril 5mg. Now there is a flexiril 10mg that has a generic and is only $5 co-pay but if I get the 5mg pills then I have to pay the higher co-pay which is like $75. That is all fine except if I get the 5mg pills and do not use the insurance card they are only $55. There are a few other meds that it is like that as well. You leave the pharmacy scratching your head.

Anyway, know that I know that I can get more for the same price I will mention it to the doc and see if he will write them all like that. I know it may not seem like much but when you spend about $150 a month on meds every penny saved helps.

Soooo?

I guess one of the questions that I have been asked to most is "how did you break your back?"

It really is not a simple answer and I honestly do not know when it broke only when we were able to diagnose it. A myriad of causes exists and many of them would fit my injury very well. Generally though it is something that happens over time and then one day, "BAM!" it is there. I remember that day very well as it was the most pain I had ever had until that day.

I had been having lower back pains prior to the "big day" and had seen my primary care doc. He sent me off for some X-Rays thinking that the pain and leg numbness might be Sciatica but the X-Ray showed Grade I spondylolisthesis. Since I still had mobility and only limited pain I was given ibuprofen and a PT regimen to help increase muscle tone in the area.

The Coup de Grace for me believe it or not was a freaking paint can lid. I had been painting the baby's room for most of the morning and when I was done like anyone else would have I bent over to close the bucket of paint. When I stood up that was all she wrote. A muscle spasm like none other dropped me to the floor. What really sucked was I was upstairs and home alone. I just laid there for a few minutes and then pretty much crawled my way to the stairs. As this was a Sunday I had to call my doc's answering service and he called me back. When I explained what happened he told me that is known as a flair up. I went and saw him the next day and was referred out to a Neurosurgeon.

The neurosurgeon is really where the journey begins as it was through him that I went through most of the pain management as well as the surgery.

I would say the biggest issue I deal with is that I do not present as a disabled person. I can walk unassisted for the most part, but when I am in stores that have carts I use one even if I am only getting a few items. If I am at the mall I can walk around for most of the day provided I stop and sit every 20-30 minutes.

I think my family was the biggest hurdle. I come from a military and very athletic family. I took them quite some time to come around to the fact that this is something that makes life a bit more interesting. I think their "come to Jesus" was when they saw me in the hospital after surgery. I think that was also the point that I realized that this is something that I will deal with forever.

I remember being all gung ho about returning to work as soon as possible. I thought 90 days post-op would see me back in the brewery doing what I really loved to do. The day I went to see the doc post-op to have the staples removed was a big smack in the face. He told me that I would not even start PT until 30-60 days post-op and that 6 months was probably the soonest he would consider allowing me to go back to work and that would be only part time and would require a position that allowed me to sit/stand as needed and not lift more then 20lbs. The brewery was definitely out of the question.

I will have to finish this later as my youngest just came downstairs and is looking for some breakfast.

Sunday is just another day

Woke up to shooting pains in my leg and foot at about 0500 this morning. Took some meds and tried to get back to sleep but it was no use. Maybe a soak in a hot tub would help. Time to start dropping hints about buying one and gauge the reaction.

Came down and made the usual pot of coffee and sat down to cruise the web. Nothing new it seems is happening that early in the morning as most of the sites still had yesterdays crap on them. About the only thing I discovered this morning is that I really need to buy a new chair for the computer desk.

Humdrum kind of start today. Maybe this would be a good day to just veg out and watch some old war flicks. Drag out "A Bridge Too Far" and "The Longest Day", that should kill about 6 hours.

Just another day

Well pretty much a normal day. I spent it with my sons just hanging around and goofing off. I took them out to lunch and then for some frozen custard since their mom had to work this afternoon.

Pain level was moderate today but I laid off the meds so that I could drive the boys around town. We went and bought some stuff to make cookies and brownies tomorrow. Good ones, not those open the log and cut them up crappy cookies. Fresh from scratch cookies like mom used to make. Nothing better then something you have made yourself.

I paid in spades though for skipping the meds this morning. By the late afternoon my back was on fire and it seemed like the pain meds were not going to catch up at all. I ended up dozing off with the youngest when he went down for his nap and when I woke up I was good to go.

Tomorrow I will spend the day in the kitchen with them and show them how to bake. I figure we can make a few dozen cookies, a tray of brownies and then maybe a cheesecake (New York Style!) I have some great low fat recipes for all of them and they come out damn good IMHO.

Thank God It's Friday!!!

Not really though. Since I work from home I can pretty much make any day Friday if I feel like it.

Got to bed fairly early last night. The baby refused to take a nap during the day. He just sat there staring back at me whenever I tried to put him down to sleep. I figured it would be hell trying at bed time as when he is over tired he is super cranky. I was shocked, about 18:45 he just dozed off in my lap. Since the wife was at work and the oldest does not have school today I took the baby upstairs and let the oldest watch Cartoon Network until 21:00.

I slept pretty well but woke up with a headache and a sore back. The burning sensation is still lingering but I found that if I recline on the couch (the ends recline like a LA-Z-BOY) and put a pillow under my knees I can get rather comfortable and reduce the pain level some. Works well if I have a few hours to just relax and not have to worry about playing taxi.

I did get some work done as well, but sitting in the chair can become rather tiresome and I need to take a break every few hours or so. I need to find a better chair then this one someday. I was thinking of switching all my work over to laptop and buying a recliner for the office. I would be able to get tons more done if I did not have to get up every 2-3 hours. Time to start dropping hints for Christmas!!!

This is what it looks like before they install it. Basically once it is in they will do the bone graft and if done properly the bone will grow through the holes in this and help stabilize the area.

A better image of what the cage might look like once it is inserted. While this shows two in place I only have one installed.

An image of BAK being inserted

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This is what the BAK cage is and how it is inserted into the spine.

Surgical procedures

I found some interesting things this morning on exactly what happens during the surgery. The first is the laminectomy that the surgeon performs to free the nerves being affected.

Laminectomy
The term laminectomy is derived from lumber (lower spine), lamina (part of the spinal canal's bony structure) and -ectomy (removal). The operation is performed to relieve pressure on one or more spinal nerve roots. This pressure, often called nerve root compression or a "pinched nerve", is what often causes back and leg pain.
Nerve root compression is caused by:

Ruptured disc - Also called a protruded, slipped or herniated disc.
Spondylosis - Deterioration or "wear and tear" of multiple discs with bony spur formation and degenerative disc.
Scar tissue
Combination of the above factors

After the laminectomy I also had fusion and instrumentation done to give stability to the area of the spine that was affected. The big difference in my case was that I did not receive a bone graft from my hip, I received a donor graft from a cadaver.

Another type of spine surgery is spinal fusion. The diseased disc and lamina are first removed. Pieces of bone are removed from your hip (donor) and are placed along the spine and between the vertebrae. This is called bone grafting. When the bone heals, this is called a bone fusion and the vertebrae no longer move separately. This fusion takes three months to heal.

Indications for Spinal Fusion

When a disc ruptures, the hydraulic effect of the disc is disrupted. The facet joints (the joints between two vertebrae), muscles, and surrounding ligaments are required to take over the job of the disc. If the disc does not heal, it is said to be degenerative. A degenerative disc is not able to support the weight of the body and the space between vertebra narrows. When the space between two vertebra narrows, so do the holes (or foramen) that the nerves pass through. This causes the nerve to be pinched and results in leg and/or back pain. Over time the facet joints become arthritic, get larger, and develop bone spurs.

This is called spondylolisis and narrows the formen even further. Finally, as the facet joints become arthritic and lose their cartilage, they begin to slide on one another. This allows one vertebrae to “slip” on the other, narrowing the hole even more. This kind of slipping and narrowing is a dynamic process and is worse when sitting or riding in a car and is called spondylolisthesis.

When a nerve is pinched by a ruptured disc, the disc material can be removed to relieve pressure on the nerve (laminectomy and discectomy). When the disc is degenerative and the nerve is pinched by bone (from narrowing of the disc space and foramen, spondylolisis, and slipping or spondlylolisthesis), spinal fusion is indicated to relieve pressure on the nerve and keep the vertebra from slipping.

With the development of fusion cages, it is now much easier to relieve pressure on a pinched nerve, keep the vertebra from slipping, and getting the fusion to heal. The fusion cages can be put in from the back or from the front. We prefer to put our cages in from the back because, the nerves can be seen better and protected better during surgery and the holes (foramen) can be made bigger allowing the nerve more room.

In addition I also received what is called a BAK cage to help keep the space between the vertebra open.

BAK Cage
Extracted from Agusta Orthopedic Surgery

This surgical procedure is used when there is severe enough disc degeneration and narrowing that more space is needed between the bones of the spine. A small cylinder is placed between the bones of the spine to hold them apart. The cage has holes in it and the bone grows in and around it, holding it in place. This relieves the pressure on the nerves of the spine and patients are usually able to return to a more active lifestyle and control their back pain.



The purpose of a spinal fusion is to eliminate painful motion that occurs at that spinal segment.

There are many techniques used to fuse spinal segments. The main advantage touted in favor of the BAK cage is that it can be done through a limited exposure.

The BAK cage is typically inserted from the anterior or frontal approach via a laproscopic procedure. Thus it requires no large incision and tissue trauma can be limited. Recovery time is thereby minimized.

The BAK cage allows the patient to be up and about without a hard plastic brace. However, the BAK fusion cage depends on the bone healing from one vertebra through the cage to the other vertebra. It is imperative that the patient not smoke. Smoking decreases blood supply (because of the nicotine). Spinal fusions require a good blood supply to heal and the process can take up to 4 months.

Once the pinch on the nerve is removed, the patients legs feel better and stronger almost immediately. The patient will experience moderate back discomfort, however. A lumbar corset can be worn for support. The intense back pain resolves quickly (2-3 days), but the residual nagging back ache lasts up until the fusion is healed.

The procedure must still be considered experimental. It is not widely available. It is also technically demanding and takes a lot of experience to master the technique. At this time there is promise for the procedure, but one must be very cautious about pursuing the surgery, reviewing the credentials and experience of the surgeons

Total time I spent in surgery was about 9 hours start to finish. The only thing I remember was being wheeled from the prep area to the OR and asking them to take some pictures once they cracked me open. I mean how often do you really get to see your own spine through some media other then X-Ray?

In the prep room we did all the final prep for the surgery including signing a power of attorney should something go wrong and I would be unable to make my own decisions. They discussed the possibilities of complications from the surgery and the anesthesia (including death). Well it all may sound morbid they are issues that anyone having major surgery should consider.

When they finished throwing paperwork at me they started to put in the IV and EKG monitor leads. They also screwed little electric leads into my head and feet. I remember asking them what they were for and I think the answer was so they could see what nerves they were working on. After they finished I was wheeled into the OR.

The OR was the cleanest room I have ever been in. I remember seeing all the foam padding on the table and can only figure they used it to stabilize me into the position they would need. I also remember seeing the Makita drill boxes on the table and laughing to myself, after that I was out like a light.

I woke up in recovery shivering and shaking from coming out from under the anesthesia. They said that was a normal effect and then the warmest blanket I have ever had was put on me. They keep blankets in the warmer as the OR and Recovery rooms are kept very cold to hamper infectious organisms.

I remember my family coming in to see me but I was back out after that. I woke the next day in the ICU scratching the hell out of myself. Turns out that some people do not tolerate morphine well and the side effect is feeling itchy.

The rest of my stay in the hospital was about 5 day in the regular neuro ward doped up and watching the war on TV (my surgery was right after the war kicked off in Iraq). I do remember the nice nurse who helped me roll over and then packed a ton of ice on my back to keep the swelling down.

Anyway, just some memories from my surgery and hospital stay.

What is Spondylolisthesis?

Spondylolisthesis is defined as the movement of adjacent vertebra relative to each other.

Although spondylolisthesis can be caused by many pathologic entities, degenerative spondylolisthesis is by far the most common. With aging, discs lose water content and ultimately height. As the vertebra on either side of the disc come closer to each other through the loss of disc height, the upper vertebra slides forward on the subadjacent vertebra producing spondylolisthesis. High stresses and motion produce degeneration of the disc and for this reason the most susceptible levels of the lumbar spine, L4-L5, followed by L3-L4 and L5-S1 are the vertebral segments most commonly involved.

Spondylolisthesis is also associated with deterioration of the facet joints connecting the two vertebra. As the facet joints become arthritic due to this deterioration, they enlarge in an attempt to confer stability. As the two rings of the vertebral segments which make up the spinal canal, slide past each other, the canal narrows in size . The combination of canal narrowing and enlargement of the facet joints, produces the characteristic nerve compression problems found in degenerative spondylolisthesis. The nerves are compressed in two major areas at the site of a degenerative spondylolisthesis. It is believed that a reduction in nerve blood flow accounts for the symptoms produced from spinal canal narrowing (Spinal stenosis).

That in a nutshell is what spondy is. Once again I feel good knowing that I am not average and have to be different. My spondy is at the L5/S1, which according to this passage is not the most prevalent spot! However my Spondy was brought about by Spondylolysis which is described below.

The most common X-ray identified cause of low back pain in adolescent athletes is a stress fracture in one of the bones (vertebrae) that make up the spinal column. Technically, this condition is called spondylolysis (spon-dee-low-lye-sis). It usually affects the fifth lumbar vertebra in the lower back, and much less commonly, the fourth lumbar vertebra.

If the stress fracture weakens the bone so much that it is unable to maintain its proper position, the vertebra can start to shift out of place. This condition is called spondylolisthesis (spon-dee-low-lis-thee-sis). If too much slippage occurs, the bones may begin to press on nerves and surgery may be necessary to correct the condition.

Basically it is a broken bone that allows the vertebra to move freely about. I was originally diagnosed in 2002 with this and spent several months doing physical therapy and pain management to control it. My job however required heavy lifting daily and usually in excess of 100lbs (about 45kilos) and upwards of 170lbs (about 77kilos) and no matter how much PT I was doing the stress put on my back ended up being to much. Sad thing is it was a kick ass job and I was the guy in charge of the whole operation.

So what happened? In the end the damage the lumbar spine was actually not so bad, I was only a grade II spondy but I was having a lot of trouble with the nerves that run from the L5. They were being compressed by the disk which in turn was causing shooting pain down the left leg as well as numbness. From time to time I would also have what is known as a "flair up" in which the muscles in the lower back became so over worked they would start to spasm. That would put you down for a couple of days with pain meds and muscle relaxers. I consulted with a neurosurgeon for several months who I must say was one of the most professional docs I have ever met. He helped me understand a lot of what was going on and mapped out a treatment plan for me that included all the possible outcomes and how we would treat X if Y happened. Due to the nerve compression though we decided to move forward and have the surgery done before the damage was permanent.

Autumn is here...

Did not sleep well last night for some reason. I am not sure if it was the burning sensation in the lower back or the fact that I was sweating even though the bedroom was not hot. The burning though I am sure is coming from the medrol wearing off and the nerves being restricted by the scar tissue. I was able to make it tolerable with some pain meds and at least get some sleep.

Pain is all mind over matter, right? If you do not mind it does not matter. I would like to take the guy who said that beat his ass senseless and then ask him his opinion on pain.

Today should be nice as well as The Autumnal Equinox. It is fairly nice out right now at 60F/16C. They are saying we will be in the high 70's to the mid 80's by late afternoon. Looks like some rain for tomorrow but that should help cool it down some more. I am looking forward to being able to keep the windows open for a few weeks before it gets to cold.

I don't know what I been told

One thing I have not really talked about here is my service in the Army. It may have been a contributing factor to the spondylolisthesis so I guess this is a fitting forum for it.

I grew up the son of a US Army Field Artillery officer so naturally my life was spent seeing what goes on in the military. During the summer between my junior and senior years I decided I wanted to enlist so the very day I turned 17 I went and took the ASVAB and physical. Being a junior meant that I could not go on active duty yet as the Army requires a HS diploma or GED, so I looked at what was called split option. Basically I would enlist in the reserves and go to basic during the first summer and then after graduation I would go to AIT. There were no infantry units in my area and the only thing they were offering was 88T, railroad repairman. Not being someone who likes to fix things (I prefer to break them) I passed on the option and finished my senior year. In April of my senior year I hit MEPS again and got an AD 11X option. Of course back in my day there were more then 11B's and C's, you also had 11H and 11M's. I left Fort Benning in late 88 as a newly minted 11B ready to take on the world.

During my time in the Army I was stationed at Fort Irwin as part of the OPFOR. I was part of the 1/52INF(M) that played the role of the Soviet Army and trained other units how to fight the Soviet threat. Of course with the collapse of the Soviet Union or mission changed somewhat but we still trained all US Army units in armored warfare.

While I was at Irwin I was transitioned to 11M and given a Bradley to call my own. I thought hitting the ranges was fun as a leg but when they let me fire the 25mm cannon on the Bradley I knew I had found my true calling. Running a Bradley crew is a tough job though. You have both the vehicle and the dismounts to watch out for and it can be a handful at times.

I also went to the promotion board and then to PLDC while I was there. Upon graduation I made the cutoff score and was promoted from Corporal to Sergeant.

In the end I spent 6 years at Fort Irwin. While it was a great job and I loved the desert I did not want to homestead. This was all during the draw down of the mid 90's and new duty stations were tough to come by. It was either re-enlist for 5 years at the NTC or go to Korea for a year. I decided it was time for me to head home and go to college. In 1994 I left AD for the National Guard and went home to use my GI Bill to go to school.

I would love to go back to active duty but due to my current injuries I am no longer medically fit for service. When I had the surgery and they fused my vertebra together I was DQ'd for life from going back into the service. It appears that this is one of those injuries that they will not even consider a waiver to allow me to go back in a limited role.

Back from the doc

Well the visit when pretty good. I did not ask about the duragesic patch as he was this time very receptive to my telling him that darvocet was ok for now. I know on some days it is not the best at controlling the pain but it is much better then ibuprofen which is all I had before. Since I am taking the darvocet in combination with some other pain management meds I am happy to stay where I am at for now. I would hate to step up to a more potent med, even at a low dose, and build up a tolerance so that when I truly need it, it does not work.

All in all it was a good visit.

Tillman Remembered by the Cardinals

Tillman Remembered by the Cardinals

Rest In Peace Ranger Tillman. We will see you on the final objective.

A cool and crisp September day

It is cool and crisp this morning, if it would just stay that way it would be a perfect day.

Feeling good this morning, but not sure if it is the meds or that I get to see the doc. Hopefully he is responsive to my questions and agrees with me on most of them. Since surgery is obviously not going to fix this maybe we could try the implant or the patch for now and see where we are in 90 days. I am far to young to be popping pills every day like this!!! I feel like I should be living in AZ or FL in a retirement village. Of course if that were the case then I would be able to buy a golf cart instead of a car. Think of the savings!

Summer starts to fade away....

Well looks like football season is here. The one sport that I truly loathe and lucky me, I live in the heart of redneckville where this is the only sport apparently. Guess I will be watching a lot more of the History Channel and A&E.

My hatred of football stems from many things but one specific event stands out in my mind more then any other. I had a job where we had a break room with a TV. During the football season they would put it on the channel for the local team. We had this guy named Jim who would holler and shout at the TV constantly, you know the type, can play armchair quarterback better then the people who get paid to do it for a living. Well after one particular game where the local team took a beating this moron Jim got up and threw a chair through the screen and then started a fight with the people who were trying to calm him down.

Other then that it takes WAY TOO LONG to play. A 60 minute game goes for 2.5 hours, WTF is up with that? There is also not enough hitting or blood to suit my needs. I have always been more of a hockey fan (grew up watching the Islanders play) and a lacrosse fan (first Varsity letter). Fast moving and rough going, makes for a great game.

Pain level today is moderate so I have been on the darvocet since I got up. It is riding low today, real low in the small of the back and burning as well it feels like the knitting needle is being poked in at the same time. I did get to take a nap with the baby so I was at least able to zone for awhile. I see the doc tomorrow so I will ask him about the duragesic and hydrocodone.

How lucky can one guy get?

Growing up almost everyone's parents tell them they are special. I never realized my mother was right though.

In the case of Spondylolisthesis only about 5-6% of males have spondy and even less then that, about 1% are diagnosed with arachnoiditis. How lucky can one guy get? What are the odds of being in the 5% and 1% range. I figure that gives me about .2% chance of getting both!!! Maybe I should go buy a lottery ticket.

I spent half the night up in pain and the other half hacking up a lung. Seems I have caught some kind of chest cold that has left me wheezing and congested. I originally fell asleep on the couch but moved upstairs later. I woke in pain and stumbled for my meds and as I passed the clock realized that it was only 11pm. Man that sucks!

Finally got back to sleep only to be awoken at 0400 by what sounded like bowling balls crashing down on the roof and horrendous thunder that made it feel like both fronts were sitting right on my roof. Usually in the plains that type of weather would send you running for the basement but I was too tired and could not find the flashlight. I figured fuck it, if the roof blows away I have insurance. Hell my agent is probably taking bets on my next claim after this summer's storms. We lost the roof in June and in July my neighbors tree took out my fence and ripped all the utility lines out of the house.

So here I sit with a pot of coffee and nothing to do. Time to scour the net and read up on what is going on.

Relief at last

Well it looks like I finally got the doctor to agree that I am the best judge of my pain levels. While I would have preferred hydrocodone 5/500 as I can take one or two as needed I will at least have some comfort from the darvocet 100's. Only problem is you cannot take two at once when the pain is bad and one is not cutting it as well they only last four hours compared to 6 for the hydrocodone. At the same time though I understand that we start with smaller amounts and as tolerance builds we will move on to something else rather then starting in the middle and being screwed down the road.

The medrol is wearing off slowly but surely. More and more each day the numbness and pain returns to my leg and foot and it is only a matter of time before it is all back. I don't think though that I am willing to do the medrol route again. Even watching the diet and trying to get on the bike as often as possible I still gained some weight. One of the toughest issues is weight! While I am far from being obese I do like to keep my weight in check as lower weight does indeed equate to lower pain levels as this progresses.

I see the doc next week and I am planning on asking about Duragesic patches. They are fentanyl patches that time release small doses to moderate pain. No more of the waiting to be in pain and then popping pills. I also understand that the patches do not have the euphoric effect of some of the pills. I would say that is the biggest draw back to the pills.

Rest In Peace Johnny Ramone

The leaders of the Punk movement and undoubtedly the best punk band that ever was is no more. Sadly with the passing of Johnny there is only one surviving member of the band.

They brought the punk scene to life for many of us even those of us who were a generation late to the scene. It was the early 80's when a buddy from VA let me borrow one of their albums. I was hooked from there and to this day still love to listen to their music. Simplicity while being cutting edge is difficult they managed to do it.

Woke to the sound of rain

Ah, rain! Maybe it will drive away this horrible humidity that has been lingering for a few days. While it has not been blazing hot it has been so humid that the second you step outside you are soaked.

Feeling good today, not a lot of pain this morning. My foot actually hurts more from where I kicked the damn fridge. It is nice and swollen so I have had to wear sandals to go out of the house, my sneaker won't fit with it as swollen as it is. D'oh!

Yesterday was spent trying to get my neighbors insurance company to pony up the $500 for my deductible. His tree came down during a storm and ripped all my utility lines out of the house, destroyed 40' of fence and ripped some siding from the house. The neighbor and I had a discussion not 1 month before this happened about the tree being in a state of decay and it needed to be either pruned or removed. He did neither and of course denies the conversation ever took place when the insurance company asked him about it. Uh Oh! To bad for him that as soon as we had the conversation I went and shot video and took pictures of it in case the need was ever there. I burned a copy and will send it to them today as well as video/pictures of the tree lying in my yard and a report from an arborist who backs up my claim that the tree was an accident waiting to happen.

Arachnoiditis

Here is a site about archnoiditis that I believe I missed in my links section.

For those who do not know what it is about, basically due to either sickness or injury to the arachnid membrane scar tissue starts to form around the nerves. Over time as the scar tissue grows it will hamper the nerves ability to function properly.

The time frame from when the injury/illness occurs and the scar tissue forms varies in each patient. Most of what I have read says years (like 10+) is about the average. Once again though I have to prove to every body that I am an above average kind of guy. My arachnoiditis was about a little over a year from all the surgery/epidurals.

Day to day is ok as long as I don't over do it. Generally you will find me on the couch as it reclines on both ends and I have found that if I prop some pillow just right I can stay like that for a few hours of relative pain free time. Some days however there is just no helping it and not even the pain meds will touch it. Those are the ones where I find a quiet spot and read. I have noticed that when I am having a bad day as far as pain levels, I am even shorter tempered then normal.

My foot is swollen from where I caught the fridge. It was truly one of those moment where I wish someone would have caught it on tape. I am sure it was worth $10K from America's Funniest Videos and maybe more!

AAOS Online Service Fact Sheet Spondylolysis and Spondylolisthesis

AAOS Online Service Fact Sheet Spondylolysis and Spondylolisthesis

If it isn't one thing

Well I must say that I feel good today. Well rested and minimal lower back and leg pain, if all days were like this I would be happy.

Of course, my right foot is swollen like a softball. My youngest was playing daredevil last night and standing on a basketball to reach on to the counter. I caught this all just in time to see him lose his balance and fall face first onto the kitchen floor. I tried to "dive" to get to him before he could land but ended up kicking the fridge barefooted. Between his screaming and my seemingly unending string of profanity, my oldest thought we had been seriously hurt. Of course toddlers bounce right back and in 2 minutes it was like it never happened for him. I on the other hand am know hobbling around the house. If we must look for the good in all things I would have to say that it is nice to limp on the other side for a change.

Assault weapon ban sunsets

BOISE, Idaho - The expiration Monday of a 10-year federal ban on assault weapons means firearms like AK-47s, Uzis and TEC-9s can now be legally bought a development that has critics upset and gun owners pleased.

The 1994 ban, signed by President Clinton, outlawed 19 types of military-style assault weapons. A clause directed that the ban expire unless Congress specifically reauthorized it, which it did not.

Studies done by pro- and antigun groups as well as the Justice Department (news - web sites) show conflicting results on whether the ban helped reduce crime. Loopholes allowed manufacturers to keep many weapons on the market simply by changing their names or altering some of their features or accessories.

Gun shop owners said the expiration of the ban will have little effect on the types of guns and accessories that are typically sold and traded across their counters every day.

At the Boise Gun Co., gunsmith Justin Davis last week grabbed up a black plastic rifle resembling the U.S. military's standard issue M-16 from a row of more than a dozen similar weapons stacked against a wall.

The civilian version of the gun, a Colt AR-15 manufactured before 1994, could be sold last week just as easily as it can be sold this week. "It shoots exactly the same ammo at exactly the same rate of fire," said Davis.

Many states including California, Massachusetts, New York and Hawaii have passed their own laws curbing the use of assault weapons. Some of those are more stringent than the federal ban.

U.S. Rep. Butch Otter, R-Idaho, trumpeted the end of the federal law.

"President Clinton's so-called 'assault weapons' ban was nothing more than a sop to antigun liberals," Otter said Friday in a written statement. "It provided only the illusion of reducing gun violence, but it did real damage to our liberties."

But advocates for the ban, including the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, point to some particularly vicious shootings in which military-style weapons were used including the 10 killings in the sniper shooting spree that terrorized residents in Maryland, Virginia and Washington, D.C., in 2002.

National police organizations such as the International Association of Chiefs of Police, the International Brotherhood of Police Officers and the Fraternal Order of Police all support the renewal of the ban. President Bush (news - web sites) has said he would sign such a bill if Congress passed it.

Idaho State Police spokesman Rick Ohnsman said troopers have had no significant problems with assault style weapons and his agency has not taken a position for or against the federal legislation.

"Of course, the legitimate owners of guns register them. Unfortunately, whether there is a ban or not, some individuals will find ways to get weapons that are illegal."

The expiration of the assault weapons ban does not mean the end of federal background checks. The 1993 Brady Handgun Violence Prevention Act is separate legislation from the assault weapons ban, said Daniel Wells, chief of the FBI unit charged with overseeing the background checks system.

"The change in law relating to assault weapons has no impact on the Brady Law," Wells said.

Davis predicted the biggest change in his business will be the ability of manufacturers and importers to market higher capacity ammunition magazines the removable "clip" that holds and feeds bullets through guns.

Under the 1994 ban, the maximum capacity of a magazine was set at 10 rounds. That sent the price of high-capacity magazines through the roof, Davis said, even though magazines manufactured before the ban were protected by a "grandfather" provision and could still be sold.

Now, some gun manufacturers are planning to give away high-capacity magazines as bonuses for buying their weapons. Sales of formerly banned gun accessories, such as flash suppressors and folding stocks, are also expected to take off.

In the end this did nothing but drive the cost of legal weapons up. They will never understand that a criminal will always be able to get just about any weapon they desire.

WASHINGTON They go by names that suggest power and danger the "Streetsweeper," the TEC-9, the MAK90, the AK-47.

And that's exactly what these military-style assault weapons bring. The power to kill indiscriminately.

Now there is fear here that the bullet-spraying semi-automatic weapons are heading back to American streets.

The gun debate in the United States has moved back to the forefront as a 1994 ban on assault weapons lurches toward an expiry date and it promises to become a pivotal issue in the next presidential election.

U.S. President George W. Bush surprised many when he distanced himself from the powerful National Rifle Association during the 2000 campaign, advocating an extension of the assault-weapon ban that ends in September, 2004.

But there are signs here that Bush now appears to want to have it both ways, tacitly supporting the extension to court suburban support in key states, while doing nothing overtly to stop a move that could see Congress simply avoid a vote on the extension and let it die.

That would be a powerful nod-and-wink to the firearms lobby, which, by some accounts, poured $1.6 million into the 2000 Bush campaign.

"Does George W. Bush want to be known as the pro-assault weapon president?" said Joe Sudbay, the public policy director of the Washington-based Violence Policy Center.

"He may be trying to have it both ways now, but it will be pretty clear by Sept. 13, 2004. He either supports the extension or he doesn't ... he either extends it or he doesn't."

The 1994 law made it illegal to import, manufacture, transfer or possess 19 types of semi-automatic weapons, although the law was "grandfathered," meaning anyone who legally owned such weapons before that date could retain them.

Tom DeLay, the Texas Republican and House of Representatives majority leader, said last week he didn't believe the extension would come to a vote in the Republican-dominated House. DeLay's statement drew a surprising rebuke from the Republican Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert, showing that the gun ban does not easily cut across Republican-Democrat lines in this country.

While many Democrats are fearful of defeat if they are targeted by the gun lobby in the coming elections, there are many Republicans representing so-called "soccer mom" suburban constituencies who could become electoral toast if they are seen to be backing a measure which would bring the deadly weapons legally back to the streets of America.

White House spokesperson Ari Fleischer said last week Bush has not had any change of heart from his 2000 campaign promise. But he offered no explanation as to why Bush has given no presidential muscle to the promise. He has not been shy about stumping the country pushing for his tax-cut proposals, but has said nothing publicly about assault weapons.

"The House does everything the president wants," New York Democratic Senator Charles Schumer said. "He wants a dividends tax cut, they do it. He wants one bill or another, they jump. In fact ... they say `how high?' He's got to walk the walk (on guns). If the president wants this bill to come to his desk, it will. If the president doesn't, he can have his minions whisper to the House, `kill the bill,' and he'll never reach it."

In 1994, the ban passed the House by a mere two votes, but it has been something less than a rousing success, even the anti-gun lobby concedes.

Many weapons manufacturers simply cosmetically changed the specs on the weapons to circumvent the ban, cynically adding "AB" to their model numbers, indicating they were changed "after the ban."

In 2000, 28,653 died of gunshot wounds in the U.S.; 94 children and teens in Louisiana alone. The gun death rate during that year was 10.4 per 100,000 population.

The Violence Policy Center released a study last week indicating that 41 of 211 law enforcement officers gunned down in the line of duty between Jan. 1, 1998, and Dec. 31, 2001 almost one in five were felled by assault weapons.

During a three-week reign of terror last October, the Washington snipers used a modified Bushmaster assault rifle, an XM15 M4 A3. The company's sales have soared since 1994.

The teens behind the 1999 Columbine massacre used modified TEC-9s.

"There's not a dime's worth of difference in the performance characteristics between the guns on the banned list and the guns not on the banned list," said NRA executive vice-president Wayne LaPierre.

Anti-gun advocates want an even tougher ban to replace the 1994 law, but, right now, there is little hope in Washington the law will be improved. It is more a question of a dogged fight to keep the status quo.

Bryan Miller of Philadelphia knows something about fight and he doesn't buy the conventional Washington spin.

Miller joined the advocacy group CeaseFire PA after his brother, an FBI agent, was slain at District of Columbia police headquarters in 1994. It was a case of mistaken identity. The gunman, carrying a concealed TEC-9, was looking for the head of homicide. Mike Miller was in the "cold case" squad.

"He went the wrong way ... but somebody was going to die, anyway," Miller said. Since then, Miller has worked tirelessly to control guns in his country.

"These guns are ugly," he said in an interview. "We have tapes of those kids firing away in Columbine. We have families of victims and people like me who have lost loved ones to these guns.

"We have lots of support. And we are just getting started."

You have to love that. The power to kill indiscriminately! Hello! Any weapon has that power not just AK-47's, Tec-9's etc... In fact some of the weapons that did not make the banned list are far worse then those that were on the list.

In the end our government has done the right thing. Allow those of us who choose to own legal firearms to do so while making the penalty for illegal gun possession tougher.

While they like to point out how many people were killed by assault style weapons they fail to distinguish them as pre-ban or post-ban. That's right, they were still legally produced after the ban went into effect.

How is that you say?

The ban was purely cosmetic and nothing else. Gone were the folding stocks, bayonet lugs and high capacity magazines. Not a single thing made the weapons less deadly and nothing prevented the sale of pre-ban weapons. They could still be purchased albeit at a much higher premium because of the ban.

In the end firearms are what kill people, there is no difference in a .22 auto and an M-16 variant. They are both deadly when used improperly. If you truly want your streets to be safer let your reps know that you want tougher sentencing on crimes involving firearms. Right now it is only a mandatory 5 under federal guidlines, make it 20!

Not much of a day really. Took the boys to get their hair cut and that was about it. I was in the mood to cook this evening so I made some chicken stew with brown rice. Forgot to make the dumplings though, everyone knows that stew is not stew without dumplings.

Mild pain throughout the day but nothing that was really nagging. I was able to squeeze in a nap while everyone else went about their day. Sometimes it is nice to have the house to myself. No chasing this one down or telling that one to leave their brother alone.

All in all a nice lazy day. To bad it was not really warm enough to fill the kiddie pool for the baby. He loves to splash around in it. Since we did get haircuts I let him have an early bath and an extended bath so he could play around.

Let's Roll!

These are some of the last words from Todd Beamer before he and several other passengers stopped the hijackers of flight 93 from finishing their mission. It is because of the brave men and women aboard that flight and their disregard for their own safety that the casualty numbers were not higher that day. They cared enough about their fellow man that they epitomize the truest sense of selfless sacrifice. I only hope that we all can live up to the standards set that day and continue on as Americans.

Many hero's were born that day and sadly many of them died. Three years later I still have trouble holding back the emotions that were present that day. The sadness at the loss of innocent lives and the anger over who would do such a thing. The sadness only tempered by the selfless acts of thousands of people who raced to the scene to aid those in need.

The hero's though did not stop that day. They continued on and brought the fight to the front door of those who were behind this deed. They continue to hunt them down and hold them accountable for their actions. These hero's are the sons and daughters of our neighbors and they are our brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers. They continue to sacrifice their own safety and at times have paid for freedom with their own blood. They too are hero's.

I find it increasingly difficult to put into words what I feel and think about this. I know some of those who have died in both the attacks and in the war on terror and it tears at me inside that they had to die. It hurts that people would perpetrate such acts of terror on innocent victims and then rejoice in their deaths. What kind of a sick person do you have to be to do such a thing?

The country came together like I had never seen before that day. While we must carry on with our own lives we must never forget what happened that day.

One of our Heros

Pennsylvania wreckage

The Pentagon

The twin towers

Father Judge.

World Trade Center wreckage

Dreaming in Visual Basic

Compared to the last several weeks I got to sleep in today. I did not get up until 0545 this morning and more importantly I fell asleep about 2100 last night. This is probable the first full nights sleep I have had in about 3 weeks. I did however wake with one of the famous headaches. Even with that though I feel refreshed and ready to go for the day.

I am in the middle of working on a project writing a macro in word 2000. Basically taking a form created in the VB editor and using it to fill in a template created in word. It has been sometime since I used Visual Basic and that was not VBA like I need for this project so it has been an experience so far. I actually had to leave it for a few days and come back to it as I was stuck on some lines of code. Syntax was killing me but after scouring the net yesterday I was able to find a snippet that I could adjust to suit my needs. Hopefully I will be able to wrap up the project this weekend and have it going by next week.

Relief at last

I finally had enough of the nagging pain and called the doctor. I know during our last conversation he was very anti prescribing anything for pain and instead put me on NSAID's which have done squat. I was on COX-2 inhibitors as well as some other NSAID's and even working together they could not cut through the pain on the bad days. I just got a call back from the doctor's office and they are going to call in Darvocet N-100. Not my first choice as it does not get all the pain it is a start. It will at least keep all the pain within a manageable range and that is all I ask.

What is your major malfunction numbnuts?

Another excellent morning and a brisk 52F. The summer is certainly changing to fall quickly here and that is fine by me. It was cold enough last night that the house is 2 degrees cooler in the morning then when I went to bed. Of course that makes me all to happy as it was still comfortable but no electricity was used. I can only imagine what my utility bill is going to look like for August. While it was not 100+ this year the AC did run a good amount. Those price gouging bastards at the electric company are to busy lining their own pockets to worry about the little guy.

Feeling rather good this morning. A little stiff in the lower back but not to bothersome right now. Some light tingling in the leg and foot but what else is new? Maybe I can hit the gym this morning and ride the Recumbent bike. I would love to be able to hit the weights again but no compression of the spinal cord is the order of the day for now. Since the bike is seated and adjusts to each person it can be made to be comfortable enough to go for about 30 minutes every other day. Much more then that and it seems like I aggravate the arachnoiditis.

One of the biggest problems I faced after surgery was dealing with my weight. I dropped from 200lbs to 183lbs over the 4 weeks I was really down and out. My diet was pretty much Orange Juice and Yogurt as it was the only thing that I really cared to eat. Once I was up and moving again my appetite returned so I needed to make sure I did not rocket into the fat boy zone. Well we have always eaten rather healthy I needed to really start watching more then just that. A calorie restriction was about the only way to do it. Before surgery I was very active and my job required a ton of heavy lifting that helped keep me in shape. Once that went away though... Eating 2800-3200 calories a day was not going to work.

What the heck happened?

Well I posted this morning but it seems to have disappeared.

Well, damn. The morning started out fairly early again at 0515. However this morning waking early was ok as I had some chores to run before running the oldest to school. A quick trip at 0600 to the grocery store to grab the essentials like milk, bread, juice and coffee.

The pain level today was moderate throughout the day. I would say I was hovering about a 5 but I also had a monster headache that may have factored in. The pain is hard to describe sometimes but imagine having a large needle slowly pushed into your back. Stiff and sore this evening but I am going to grab the heating pad on the way up to bed later on. A quick stint on that while I play some PS2 and then it is off to lala land for me.

Just another day

It is a nice cool crisp morning. Almost time to break out the sweaters and stoke the fireplace.

If course another early morning but this time I had a mission. I needed to get some more coffee, creamer and juice. Nothing like running out of everything when you need it most. A quick trip to the grocery store and all is well in lala land.

Slight headache this morning and a very stiff lower back, must mean rain is coming soon. Not a lot of lower back pain this morning but the stinging numbness is there as well is the pain in the left arm from when the damaged the radial nerve. That usually goes away fairly quickly and while it is annoying it is generally not high on the pain scale.

I am a little miffed though. My magazine subscriptions all seem to have ended. That leaves my Monday and Tuesday wide open with nothing to read. I thought I signed for a 2 year subscription on all of them, guess I did not though. Now we will have to wait until the magazine drive starts again. We get them through my sons school and they get a portion of the deal. Since it helps keep tuition low I am all for it. I guess I can suffer and read the online version. :-)

Science can be wonderful

But in this case it isn't. Another bright and early morning here in the central plains. Fortunately I live in a city that does not allow farm animals on property otherwise I am sure any minute now the roosters would be crowing.

Very uncomfortable night. Not sure why but no position was comfortable for more then an hour or so. Seems like I was up and checking the clock every hour and while the AC was set for a comfortable range the room seemed awfully warm. I ended up just sleeping with the sheet instead of the comforter. Maybe the warmth was the whole problem, maybe it is all in my head!!!

The medrol is definitely wearing off. The low intensity burning in the lower back has come back as well the numbness in the toes and leg. It feels like I have to go to the bathroom all the time which is not a good thing. The Cauda Equina is the nerve bundle associated with this and if the arch or spondy has affected that area you're basically screwed. I would think that my last MRI in August would have picked that up but the doc did not mention it and neither does the radiology report I went and got. I will bring it up with the doc on the next visit unless it gets worse sooner then that.

Should be another nice day. It is in the mid 50's this morning and I doubt that we will get up 30 degrees from there. So my guess is mid 70's by 1500. The forecast for the week looks nice as well, nothing above the mid 80's through next Monday is forecast. Time to open the windows and air out the house!

So how was your day honey?

Well the pain has returned to the lower back. I am sure some of it is due in part to chasing a toddler around all day. He has literally been swinging from anything he could climb on as well he does the dog head down and climbs the walls backwards. Once he is vertical he pushes off with his feet and does a somersault. Makes me cringe when he hits the floor. He also decided that all the tupperware/rubbermaid should be on the kitchen floor rather then the drawers. You get the idea. I would not trade these days though and I try to get as many pictures as I can. But even that is a challenge. Instead of a kid who likes to ham for the camera I have one that wants to take it from you. Maybe one of these days I will post some from the collection I like to call "a toddlers eye view of the world." Most of the pics are of the floor, ceiling or kneecaps. LOL!

Time to take some flexeril and drink a cup of tea. Some nice Earl Grey with a touch of honey and then relax on the couch.

Still it begins needles and pins...

Well the baby decided to take a monster of a nap today. I guess I fell asleep with him for most of the time. I did not realize how tired I was!

The numbness is staring to return to the left leg and foot. No matter what I have done my foot feels like I am standing on pins and needles. My calf and knee are ok for now, my guess would be that in the next 3 or 4 days they will be the same as before the medrol. Damnit!

On top of all this now my insurance company is starting to deny coverage for some of the doctors visits saying it was pre-existing. While the spondy certainly was I have not been seen for that since June of last year. I was diagnosed with the arachnoiditis after benefits started so I don't see how this is pre-existing by their own guidelines. Hell, I did not even have the pain until after the policy started and was not diagnosed until months later. I will call them tomorrow and see what is going on. I have been down this road before so at least I know the way...

Man it is going to be a nice day

Took a few minutes to run to the store as my supply of graham crackers was running low. It is crisp and cool outside, the way I like it. The trees are starting to turn colors which is also a good sign that the hot days of summer will be gone very soon. Of course that also means 8 dumpster loads of leaves from that damned elm tree in the neighbors yard. I am tempted to cut all the limbs hanging over into my yard down. Checked with the city and state and got the buzz on what I can and cannot do. I am free to trim away!!! The guy who owns the house rents it out and lives elsewhere in town. As a former rental owner myself I am appalled at the guys behavior when the city told him it was his tree he and he was legally bound to clear it and make reparations. Basically the guy is a putz.

Busted flat in Baton Rouge

Well looks like the storms that developed yesterday did not do much and we actually kept power the whole night. Seems in the recent months the local utility has had some problems keeping the transformer for my side of the street from working properly in the rain. We have lost power about 10 times since late May when we get heavy rain. Usually it is out for about 10-12 hours before they get it up again. Between that and the damage from the microburst my insurance company loves me! What really sucks when the transformer blows is that it is just our side of the street. Nothing better then losing power and seeing that 30' on the other side of the road they all have it. We are going to install a generator in the late fall or early winter so that we won't have to deal with this next year. We found a good model that with installation will be about $5k and it will run on NG.

Anyway, woke up with another headache so I headed downstairs at 0545 to find the meds and start a pot of coffee. It is probably not going to go away soon but we can at least hope that it does not get worse. Picture a migraine and multiply that by about 5 and your close to what I get. Thankfully they do not happen often and I am not noise/light sensitive with them. The doc's have done CT scans on them and they have all turned up normal so I am almost positive that they are residual effects of my back.

Today should be a fairly nice day. They are saying we will be in the 70's and breezy. Looks like we will be able to hang out on the deck for the day. Maybe I will finally get some time to read my book.

Where the hell did that come from

A raging storm just popped up out of nowhere and dumped about half an inch of rain in 5 minutes. NOAA radar has it backed up to the west of us so it looks like we are in for a stormy night!

Nights like this bite but that means we might catch a break from the heat and humidity tomorrow. It would be nice to have a labor day that we can head outside and finally use the deck. Between the rain, the neighbors tree destroying the yard and the heat we have been on it once this year.

Surprised that I did not feel this storm move in. Usually the human barometer is on the money. Either it came in so fast or the meds are working finally. Looks like the bath is out though. No freaking way I am I getting in the tub during an electrical storm.

This is an x-ray (not mine) of Spondylolisthesis. You can see the arrow point to the area where the vertebra is suffering from the spondy. What basically happens is that it ends up pressing against the spinal coulmn where the nerves run out to the parts of the body. In my case it was resting on the nerve that runs to my left leg. It causes numbness and pain.

Ok, so I over did it.

Just as I thought, this mornings lawn mowing escapade was more then I should have tackled. I tried to take a nap while the baby was sleeping but nothing was comfortable and no pain meds didn't help. I can feel the muscles tighten all the way up to the middle of my back. Took the flexeril but it is not helping much. I think it is time to ask for skelaxin or soma just to change that up a bit. The mobic is for crap and I don't think I will refill it. It has no generic so my co-pay is much higher for that at $35 a months supply. Celebrex is the same way and the ibuprofin is for crap.

I thought about soaking in the tub for awhile but the plunger on the tub leaks somewhere and it has me stumped. I am mechanically declined so I better leave that one to the pros. I figure we do not use it enough to warrant the $50 the guy wants to show up to replace a $6 part.

Another 0530 morning, I guess this is just the way it is going to be for awhile. I decided to spend it yet again online hitting the usual boards and researching some more information.

The pain is mild today, probably about a 4 on the 1-10 scale, so I decided I should mow the lawn before it gets to hot. 0830 is apparently still not early enough! It is hot and humid outside and the grass was way long. That's what I get for not paying the neighbor kid to mow it for me. Now the pain is about a 6 so I will get some ice out and sit on the couch for the rest of the morning. No school for the kids tomorrow so it is ok to be lazy for another day!

Since we hit the grocery store yesterday I have a pantry full of food and I am in a cooking mood. Maybe do something with a little zing or perhaps a nice piece of salmon. Whatever it is it will have to be baked as I have no plans on standing out in the muggy ass heat and the grill is out of LP.

While this is not my X-ray this is one showing Spondylolisthesis. You can clearly see the vertebra that is compressing the spinal column.

Have you seen this man?

Well I got out of the house today. Not just a shot to the gym or to play chauffeur to the masses. I actually got out and went to the mall and Wally-World. I have been on a hunt for a book on Visual Basic for Applications. Tons of info on the net about it but not what I am looking for. I have VB 6.0 but there are some minor code changes to make it work in Word. I downloaded the .NET framework and am half tempted to do it that way but since this will be running on 2 machines with different OS's I am not sure if the other will be able to. I guess I will just have to order it from Overstock.com

It was good to get out though. I can feel it however and I am sure by later this evening I will be somewhat sorry that I did so much walking around.

Off on the hunt again for that damned book!

The early bird gets the worm?

I don't know about the worm but around here they get to make the first pot of coffee.

I actually got to sleep in today. I did not wake up until 0545! However this ibuprofin is not working worth a damn. If I did not think my doc would shot me later on for it I would go to the ER after office hours. The only other thing that prevents me from going is that both hospitals in this town do not have an ER doc staffing it. Since they are smaller hospitals they have an oncall doc who could be anything from the resident ob-gyn to the internal med doc. While I am sure they are great in their respective fields they may not be prepared for what comes in. I have been to the ER here once before and had to argue with the doc about an anti-biotic. I had a bad case of strep and ended up in the ER. I am allergic to PCN and pretty much immune to erythromycin. I told him that tetracycline works for strep and that I have had in the past with no adverse reactions. We literally argued for 5 minutes before he ripped out the PDR and verified what I was saying. Needless to say, I am not a fan of the ER in this town.

The pain is slowly moving up the spine and where I had surgery before is tight and swollen. I have taken 10mg of flexeril but it is not helping the knot at all. I may add another 10mg in a few minutes. While it is written for 5-10mg's 3X daily the max dosage can be up to 60mg a day.

The doc has office hours this morning so maybe I will jump in the shower and head that way.

Alternatives to depo-medrol epidural steroid injections

I only wish that I had done a little more research on what was out there prior to my journey. I was only to willing to accept the doc's word on my treatment, after all they are the experts. If nothing else I have learned that this is my body and I have a say in what I will and will not allow to happen to it.

While I don't believe the epidurals are what cause the archnoiditis (more likely was the myleogram) I did find some great info on what goes into the injections when depo-medrol is used.

I also have found that it should not be administered "blind" but rather it should be done under fluoroscopy to ensure accurate placement of the needle. Funny how you do not know these things until it is to late! In addition I have also found that there are alternatives to depo-medrol such as Kenalog and Celestone.

Why can't I be you

Well another 0500 morning. Guess I should start going to bed a little later that way I can sleep until 0700. Oh well, at least this way I get 2-3 hours on my own without needing to tend to ouches, snacks and anything else that comes along.

I wonder sometimes does my family truly understand what is going on with me. They know that this is not all in my head. They saw me in the ICU after surgery and they saw me dealing with the PT for months after that. No matter how I explain my situation to them though I sometimes feel like I am beating my head against a wall. I know and understand their concerns about meds and addiction. I know their fears are founded in reality of another family member who did have a problem that cost them their life. I only hope they understand that I am fully aware of what I take and how I treat those meds. I am not willing to become a junky just so I don't have to feel the pain.

My sister has tried to talk me into going to a chiropractor. I like that she is concerned and has offered solutions, but after talking to my neurosurgeon and primary care doc I have come to the conclusion that it is not something I want to do right now. The areas affected by the pain are where I have had fusion and instrumentation. The risk of re-injury or worse new injuries/breaking hardware are foremost concerns and apparently very possible with some of the methods used.

A pain in the ass

A literal pain in the ass. The medrol seems to have helped some but I am still having some pain in the lower back and left leg. Sometimes I wonder if the pain is ever going to stop or is this how it is going to be till the end? I guess what really gets me is that when we found something that worked I was taken off of it by the doc. I understand the problems some people may end up having with narcotic pain meds but when a 5 day supply lasts me 4 times as long I think it is somewhat an irrational fear. The doc and I have sat and discussed this before and I thought we understood each other but I guess not. Tylenol and Motrin just don't cut it when the pain gets intense. Imagine someone jabbing a knitting needle into your back constantly and then add to that the feeling like you have to go to the bathroom all the time. After awhile it becomes frustrating and tiresome and you have to wonder does the doctors truly understand how it is from your perspective.

Republican National Convention

Well sometime today President Bush should accept the nomination. I am excited today as much as I was when I was first able to vote. I was lucky, I turned 18 in an election year and the first thing I did was register to vote. Why wasn't it to register for the selective service? Because I had already enlisted and was counting down the hours till I shipped off to Fort Benning on an 11X contract (I would finish OSUT as an 11B1C2). In fact I was at Fort Benning and in the ending days of my OSUT when we got to vote by absentee ballot. It was the only time during my stay at Benning that we got to watch TV. One of the Drill's brought in a little color portable and all 55 of us crammed around it to watch the returns. It was an exciting time for me, new surroundings, being able to vote, serving in the military under The Great Communicator.

Now we face another election, maybe more important then my first one. We have a President who is fighting both a war on terror and a war on public opinion. The yellow media has cast an evil light on this administration and they have all but forgotten what happened on Sept 11th and when they do remember it is only in passing. They forgot that this war was not one we asked for but rather one we must fight. I won't even go into what I think of John Kerry, read some of my earlier posts for how I feel about that turd burglar.

Here is a speech given by Zell Miller last night at the RNC. It is an amazing speech and should be printed for all who did not here it to read it.

Oh yea, Zell Miller is a democrat and he really sums up John Kerry very well.

Since I last stood in this spot, a whole new generation of the Miller Family has been born: Four great grandchildren.

Along with all the other members of our close-knit family, they are my and Shirley's most precious possessions.

And I know that's how you feel about your family also. Like you, I think of their future, the promises and the perils they will face.

Like you, I believe that the next four years will determine what kind of world they will grow up in.

And like you, I ask which leader is it today that has the vision, the willpower and, yes, the backbone to best protect my family?

The clear answer to that question has placed me in this hall with you tonight. For my family is more important than my party.

There is but one man to whom I am willing to entrust their future and that man's name is George Bush.

In the summer of 1940, I was an 8-year-old boy living in a remote little Appalachian valley. Our country was not yet at war, but even we children knew that there were some crazy men across the ocean who would kill us if they could.

President Roosevelt, in his speech that summer, told America "all private plans, all private lives, have been in a sense repealed by an overriding public danger."

In 1940, Wendell Wilkie was the Republican nominee.

And there is no better example of someone repealing their "private plans" than this good man. He gave Roosevelt the critical support he needed for a peacetime draft, an unpopular idea at the time.

And he made it clear that he would rather lose the election than make national security a partisan campaign issue.

Shortly before Wilkie died, he told a friend, that if he could write his own epitaph and had to choose between "here lies a president" or "here lies one who contributed to saving freedom," he would prefer the latter.

Where are such statesmen today?

Where is the bipartisanship in this country when we need it most?

Now, while young Americans are dying in the sands of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan, our nation is being torn apart and made weaker because of the Democrat's manic obsession to bring down our Commander in Chief.

What has happened to the party I've spent my life working in?

I can remember when Democrats believed that it was the duty of America to fight for freedom over tyranny.

It was Democratic President Harry Truman who pushed the Red Army out of Iran, who came to the aid of Greece when Communists threatened to overthrow it, who stared down the Soviet blockade of West Berlin by flying in supplies and saving the city.

Time after time in our history, in the face of great danger, Democrats and Republicans worked together to ensure that freedom would not falter. But not today.

Motivated more by partisan politics than by national security, today's Democratic leaders see America as an occupier, not a liberator.

And nothing makes this Marine madder than someone calling American troops occupiers rather than liberators.

Tell that to the one-half of Europe that was freed because Franklin Roosevelt led an army of liberators, not occupiers.

Tell that to the lower half of the Korean Peninsula that is free because Dwight Eisenhower commanded an army of liberators, not occupiers.

Tell that to the half a billion men, women and children who are free today from the Baltics to the Crimea, from Poland to Siberia, because Ronald Reagan rebuilt a military of liberators, not occupiers.

Never in the history of the world has any soldier sacrificed more for the freedom and liberty of total strangers than the American soldier. And, our soldiers don't just give freedom abroad, they preserve it for us here at home.

For it has been said so truthfully that it is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press. It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech.

It is the soldier, not the agitator, who has given us the freedom to protest.

It is the soldier who salutes the flag, serves beneath the flag, whose coffin is draped by the flag, who gives that protester the freedom to abuse and burn that flag.

No one should dare to even think about being the Commander in Chief of this country if he doesn't believe with all his heart that our soldiers are liberators abroad and defenders of freedom at home.

But don't waste your breath telling that to the leaders of my party today. In their warped way of thinking America is the problem, not the solution.

They don't believe there is any real danger in the world except that which America brings upon itself through our clumsy and misguided foreign policy.

It is not their patriotism -- it is their judgment that has been so sorely lacking. They claimed Carter's pacifism would lead to peace.

They were wrong.

They claimed Reagan's defense buildup would lead to war.

They were wrong.

And, no pair has been more wrong, more loudly, more often than the two Senators from Massachusetts, Ted Kennedy and John Kerry.

Together, Kennedy/Kerry have opposed the very weapons system that won the Cold War and that is now winning the War on Terror.

Listing all the weapon systems that Senator Kerry tried his best to shut down sounds like an auctioneer selling off our national security but Americans need to know the facts.

The B-1 bomber, that Senator Kerry opposed, dropped 40 percent of the bombs in the first six months of Operation Enduring Freedom.

The B-2 bomber, that Senator Kerry opposed, delivered air strikes against the Taliban in Afghanistan and Hussein's command post in Iraq.

The F-14A Tomcats, that Senator Kerry opposed, shot down Khadifi's Libyan MIGs over the Gulf of Sidra. The modernized F-14D, that Senator Kerry opposed, delivered missile strikes against Tora Bora.

The Apache helicopter, that Senator Kerry opposed, took out those Republican Guard tanks in Kuwait in the Gulf War. The F-15 Eagles, that Senator Kerry opposed, flew cover over our Nation's Capital and this very city after 9/11.

I could go on and on and on: against the Patriot Missile that shot down Saddam Hussein's scud missiles over Israel; against the Aegis air-defense cruiser; against the Strategic Defense Initiative; against the Trident missile; against, against, against.

This is the man who wants to be the Commander in Chief of our U.S. Armed Forces?

U.S. forces armed with what? Spitballs?

Twenty years of votes can tell you much more about a man than twenty weeks of campaign rhetoric.

Campaign talk tells people who you want them to think you are. How you vote tells people who you really are deep inside.

Senator Kerry has made it clear that he would use military force only if approved by the United Nations.

Kerry would let Paris decide when America needs defending.

I want Bush to decide.

John Kerry, who says he doesn't like outsourcing, wants to outsource our national security.

That's the most dangerous outsourcing of all. This politician wants to be leader of the free world.

Free for how long?

For more than 20 years, on every one of the great issues of freedom and security, John Kerry has been more wrong, more weak and more wobbly than any other national figure.

As a war protester, Kerry blamed our military.

As a Senator, he voted to weaken our military. And nothing shows that more sadly and more clearly than his vote this year to deny protective armor for our troops in harms way, far away.

George Bush understands that we need new strategies to meet new threats.

John Kerry wants to re-fight yesterday's war. George Bush believes we have to fight today's war and be ready for tomorrow's challenges. George Bush is committed to providing the kind of forces it takes to root out terrorists.

No matter what spider hole they may hide in or what rock they crawl under.

George Bush wants to grab terrorists by the throat and not let them go to get a better grip.

From John Kerry, they get a "yes-no-maybe" bowl of mush that can only encourage our enemies and confuse our friends.

I first got to know George Bush when we served as governors together. I admire this man. I am moved by the respect he shows the first lady, his unabashed love for his parents and his daughters, and the fact that he is unashamed of his belief that God is not indifferent to America.

I can identify with someone who has lived that line in "Amazing Grace," "Was blind, but now I see," and I like the fact that he's the same man on Saturday night that he is on Sunday morning.

He is not a slick talker but he is a straight shooter and, where I come from, deeds mean a lot more than words.

I have knocked on the door of this man's soul and found someone home, a God-fearing man with a good heart and a spine of tempered steel.

The man I trust to protect my most precious possession: my family.

This election will change forever the course of history, and that's not any history. It's our family's history.

The only question is how. The answer lies with each of us. And, like many generations before us, we've got some hard choosing to do.

Right now the world just cannot afford an indecisive America. Fainthearted self-indulgence will put at risk all we care about in this world.

In this hour of danger our President has had the courage to stand up. And this Democrat is proud to stand up with him.

Thank you.

God Bless this great country and God Bless George W. Bush.

Alms for an ex leper...

Ok so here we are again at 0445 wide awake only this time I am sure it is the pain that woke me up. I went to bed with a burning pain in my lower back and numbness in my left leg. While the numbness has been ok since finishing the medrol it is still bothersome and when coupled with the pain it just sucks. I have taken some tylenol and a muscle relaxer but I might as well be spitting on an inferno to put it out. Top that off with one of my meds causes water retention which sucks. I wake up with swollen hands and feet. I probably would not have noticed it except for my wedding band digs in and if I try to put my sneakers on they are too tight. Bad enough having a wide ass foot like a 4E!

A good laugh this morning though as I read a story about some clerks who have been taken by thieves passing bogus $200 bills. I mean are there people out there that are actually that dumb? Shouldn't they have to wear a sign or something so that we can identify them and steer clear. Reminds me of the Monty Python movie The Life of Brian. More specifically the alms for an ex leper scene. D'oh! Well anyway, how can someone be so gullible and not know the bill was a phony?

Black coffee in bed

So, 0445 this morning I wake up. I am not talking about I rolled out of bed and stumbled through the house until the first pot of coffee was gone, I mean BLAM! eyes wide open and not tired. The pain was moderate but probably not what woke me, more likely was the fact that I suddenly wanted S.O.S or some eggs Benedict from The Delectable Egg in Denver. My wife and I eat there on every trip we make to Denver as well as go for a stroll up and down the 16th Street Mall.

LoDo (lower downtown) in Denver is a kick ass place. If you are a craft beer fan as I am then this is like a pilgrimage that must be made. Denver is also the home to the Great American Beer Festival and as some of the best breweries in the country. Tons of other stuff to do there as well as Denver is home to Coors Field and Six Flags Denver. It is just a great getaway location and if you go in the last weeks of summer or early fall the weather is awesome. Nice and cool, not cold and not hot. You can walk around in shorts and a light sweater and be comfortable.

We have tons going on this week and hopefully it is enough to keep my mind on other things. It has been unseasonably cool here and that is great. It means more time outside moving around which while it is painful, I would rather be doing that then sitting around the house aching. Maybe I will go hit the bookstore today and grab a book on VBA so I can finish writing this damn macro.