So why do former spouses have to be such a pain in the ass? I have told the stories about my former wife and her failure to pay her child support, for the better part of 2 years, so I finally had to contact the state and have them go after her. She has filed her taxes using our son as a dependent when that was clearly not allowed by the divorce decree and then there is all the other crap she does.

Her latest antic, and it happens every time a visit is about to happen, is to try and get our son to come out to see her before his scheduled visit. Since we live a good distance from each other there is no weekend visit and instead we go for alternating Christmas/Thanksgiving and she has him from Jun 1- Aug 1 each summer. When she had custody it was just the reverse, with my having the summer and she would try to delay my visits and then cut them short.

This year she is trying to pick up our son on the last day of school which is a good week before the Jun 1 pickup day. Now in the past I have been flexible on the dates due to travel plans, family issues or any other legitimate reason. For some reason this year she is trying to claim that we told her this would be ok when in fact we told her there was no way it would work. Of course, she tries to be the bully and this time went so far as to call my wife a liar.

She tries crap like this all the time and then of course tries to place the blame on anyone but herself, the same way it has been for the 13 years I have known her. Of course that explains why she is on her fourth (we can count 3 for sure and believe the boyfriend between #2 & 4 was actually her husband) husband in 10 years. Why can't she just stop the bullshit and be a decent person?

The good news is that the day my wife and I have been waiting for came today. My son is getting to the point in his life where he is developing good friends and he want to go hang out with them in his free time. You know, do what pre-teens do like go to the movies or go bowling. He is at that age where a lot of "school" activities are occurring in the summer and he is missing out on them. He is also missing out on the sports that he wants to play since they run in to the summer months and past the day he is supposed to leave.

When he found out that his mother wanted to pick him up before the 1st he called her and told her no way (and I have the legal ability to stop her from doing so but my hope is to not have to do that) because he has some plans for the next week after school. Apparently he has been invited to several "school's out parties" as well as his best friends birthday party next week and he very much wants to go. I am very proud of him for making this decision and then standing up for himself and his decisions. Now I have not talked to his mother yet and I am sure she will accuse me of being the "mastermind" for this but hey, that's just too bad for her.

Of course through all her smugness and acting like a complete bitch to me I have kept one thing a secret from my son, and it is something I do not plan on telling him. It is something that is always on my mind when she calls me and tries her standard crap about visitation and that is the fact that I have custody of our son because she did not want him anymore.

It was the summer he turned 4 and I had just driven him back to her house in Texas. We were not back home but a few days when she called and told me that I needed to come back and get him. I do not recall her giving me any reason that I would consider honest but my wife and I were in the car that night and driving the 14 hours to get him. She claimed it was because she was divorcing husband #2 (the guy she was screwing around on me with) yet she did not give him custody of their little girl. That's right, she divorced husband #2 (she was already dating and moving in with the guy she was cheating on #2 with and it was the guy we believe was #3), kept the daughter and took off. Ironically I recall a conversation we had when we first were married regarding kids and how all she wanted was a little girl. Funny how that worked out. She kept the little girl but not the son.

My son is a great kid. He is your typical pre-teen going through puberty who finds school boring (too smart for his on good), girls are starting to be noticed, sports are something he wants to do, showering has become a daily thing and without having to be reminded. Of course my mother and father had to remind me it is very similar to the same crap I pulled at that point in my life. Now if we could just get him to pay better attention and turn in assignments we would be ecstatic.

I have always prayed for my ex-wife. I pray that someday she realizes she is hurting not only herself but all those people who love and care for her. That her constant bullying of her family, the lying, cheating and all the other antics are not setting a good example for her children. Maybe someday...