I feel quite bad this evening. Today we were supposed to head to my parents house for an afternoon of relaxing but last night I was having some problems with spasms and decided I should not drive that far. Normally this would not be a big deal but this is one of those times my medical condition really pisses me off. I called my dad this morning and let him know that I was not comfortable making the drive and he was understanding. I have never had to cancel family plans because of my back but then again I usually have someone to drive me.

Well this evening, right after dinner time my dad called me to check up on how I was doing. Generally when he knows I am not feeling well he will make sure to call me a time or two during the day to make sure I am ok, and I figured this was no different. As soon as I answered the phone though my entire family was on the speaker phone singing Happy Birthday. Ok, yesterday was my little brothers birthday so I joined in thinking this was for him, except it was for both of us.

While my birthday is still a week and change away they had apparently planned this evening as a birthday party for both of us since we are hardly all together at one time any more. While no one told me that was what tonight was for I guess I should have had some clue. They had cake and all the trimmings for us and I blew it.

I am seriously hating this crap and the fact that it is starting to interfere more and more with my life. I understand that I am stuck with it and my wife and I have done our best to make sure it does not affect everyone else, but that apparently is going to pot and that bothers me.

I did go looking at canes this week. I stopped at several Home Health Stores thinking they would have a great selection and they do, if you want to spend $100 or more. Even with my insurance company picking up some of the cost of a cane it can still be expensive and I was left wondering how can I justify spending that kind of money on myself when my sons need shorts and sneakers for the summer. I can still get away with grabbing a cart and using that in the stores for now and then we were in CVS yesterday. Back by the pharmacy counter they had a row of canes and while some of them were expensive, they were not as bad as the specialty stores. My wife and I dug through the rack and found one that is just my size and fits my price range of super cheap, $13.99 US dollars.