I am sitting here in my recliner watching my youngest, who just like his older brother, has the uncanny ability to entertain himself for hours on end. He could have nothing more then a piece of string and a stick but he is quite content to just do whatever. Top that with the fact he is the most adorable (parental bias?) little guy and he will steal your heart in a matter of nano seconds.
The oldest is also a great kid, when he is not being a typical 12 year old snot. You know pushing the limits, playing mom and dad off each other and so on. He has not figured it out yet that I was once a 12 year old boy and I know all the tricks. Hell ask my parents and they will probably agree that my brother and I invented a good portion of them.
He is the kid who will neglect his room for weeks, regardless of what freedoms he might lose from it. He would rather go to bed an hour early each night then clean that room. Of course like many things in life that you neglect this one came back to bite him on the butt last week.
He had asked a girl (an older one at that!) to go to the movies with he and his friends. Not a problem from our end as my wife and I have talked to him many times about "dating" and "girls" and he understands perfectly well where we are coming from and what the rules of being a young man AND a gentleman are.
Now he asked this girl to the movies for Friday night but he failed to do one simple thing prior to doing so and that was clear it with mom and/or dad. The reason being is that 1- we have to drive them to and from the theater so he needs to clear it first that there is not something else planned as well that his mom is available (because I do not drive unless absolutely necessary, especially at night) to drive them. However there is an even bigger reason and that is we need to clear it for him based on his performance at home and school. Obviously for school his grades need to be at a certain level and for home he needs to have been doing his chores without having to be reminded.
Now his grades at school are decent this marking period, mostly B's & A's, but he has a C in one class but they have several weeks to go before the period ends. It is his work at home that cost him his date on Friday. The boy has not done one single one of his chores let alone clean his room for several weeks now. You practically have to drag him with the trash bags down to the cans and the dishwasher? Forget about it!
The funny thing is that on Friday afternoon he comes in from school and the first thing he blurts out is that he would like to go with this girl to the movies. Now mom is still at work so this is all me and based on his lack of chores I had to tell him he could not go but I also explained to him why citing his disaster area of a room as his biggest ding.
Thinking that was the end of the discussion we parted ways. I moved into the rec room with the little guy and the oldest took off presumably to do his homework. Well about 30 minutes later he comes down drenched in sweat asking me for the vacuum cleaner. Of course I am curious so he tells me that he has finished cleaning his room and just needs to vacuum and he will then be ready to go to the movies. LOL!
It took me all I had to not laugh in the poor kids face as I calmly explained to him that he was not going this evening. He had neglected his chores for weeks and not only that but he had failed to honor the 10 commandments (we are Catholic and he goes to Catholic School), most notably "Honor thy father and mother." I could not let him now go to the movies because he cleaned his room, it is more involved then that.
The best part though was me telling him that he had actually just screwed himself over. All those times he has taken 3 hours to clean his room only to still not have done it properly I now know he can do it in 30 minutes flat. Generally he will just shove everything under the bed or into the closet but this time it was cleaned. Clothes folded or hung as appropriate, bed made properly, desk cleaned off and toys in their proper places. The look on his face was priceless when he realized what he had done.
Sure he can be a pain in the butt at times but what 12 year old boy was not? He likes to think he is getting away with something but like most kids he only sees what is right in front of him. Hopefully this last weekends "date" lesson is one that will stick with him and he will realize that 1- Mom & Dad do not forget anything and 2- You have to earn your way, even as a 12 year old.
I have 2 great kids and I would not trade them for anything in the world.
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